Category Archives: Sex Ed

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Sex Ed

Why It Rocks To Be A Lesbian

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[Insert joke implying lesbians are good at sports and stronger than men.] 1. Low Risk Situation - Most STDs are not a problem for lesbians. And pregnancy is impossible. Basically being a lesbian is like investing in low risk stocks. Not a lot of bad is going to happen to you! 2. Sexual Acceptance - In film and television lesbianism is much more prevalent than male homosexual sex. Somehow the censors feel it's okay to show lesbians getting it on. Possibly because lesbian sex is more socially acceptable! 3. No Bells & Whistles - Throw out your birth control and let those condoms expire! You don't need anything extra to fool around with another girl! Leaving the distractions behind, I'm sure, is an added pleasure! Dive for 4 more reasons going down is bitchin'! Continue reading Why It Rocks To Be A Lesbian →
Sex Ed

Why It Rocks To Be Gay

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Since my Why It Sucks/Rocks Posts did so well and I've been neglecting the Uranians I'm extending the series! Yay another season, even if it is out of it's prime and needs to be put out of it's misery, I'm looking at you Grey's Anatomy! 1. You're A Trendy Accessory - Much like small dogs and designer handbags the gay sidekick as become a necessary celebrity accoutrement. Celebs everywhere are on the prowl for the perfect gay bestie! 2. Sexual Dynamite - Men love sex. It's true. Women love sex too but I read recently that men have 2.5 times more the capacity for thought on sexual activity as women. So, however much we might like sex, give it up, they like it more. With the added benefit of not having to worry about perioding and pregnancy it's bound to happen a little more often. 3. Out & Open Cities - San Francisco and New York City have been Mecca's for gays everywhere. It's a place where no one knows who you are, but it doesn't matter anyway. (ESP in NYC because we just don't give a fuck about anything.) 4 more reasons it rocks to dig cock after the jump! Continue reading Why It Rocks To Be Gay →
Film & TV, Sex Ed

THE REAL L WORD: More Pussy Than One Show Can Handle

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This isn't exploiting and oversexualizing lesbians at all! It's out with the old and in with the reality! Showtime is following up their hit, yet corrupted, series with a reality twist in The Real L Word. I'm guessing it's going to be a bunch of lipstick lesbians trotting around Los Angeles physically and emotionally screwing each other... much like it's scripted counterpart. Side note: Thanks for the great traffic on the sex posts (you sick bitches!) but I do understand that lately I've been leaving my LGBTQ brothers and sisters out... basically I'm implying there's going to be a couple of gay posts coming up!
Science, Sex Ed

Scientists Find Fidelity Gene

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George Clooney's vasopressin receptor gene is clearly working just fine.
Well here's your Wednesday Fun Fact: Scientists have found a gene that they believe has a direct link to how monogamous a person is. Ladies and gentlemen put your hands together for the Vasopressin Receptor Gene! The Jezebel article states,
The male brain's "area for sexual pursuit" is still 2.5 times greater than that of the female brain. But according to neuropsychiatrist Dr. Louann Brizendine, author of The Male Brain, men are still naturally inclined to search for a partner and effectively mate for life... In humans they've identified around 17 different lengths of the vasopressin receptor gene, and studies echo the vole experiment's findings: Men with longer versions of the gene in question tend to be in happy, successful marriages, whereas the guys with the shorter gene are more likely to be bachelors.
This is uber-interesting! It leads me to ask all sorts of questions (I've been having a lot of metaphysical quandaries lately.) As humans what separates us from our animal counterparts is our brain and the ability to have intelligent (but most of the times moronic) thought. Was the Vasopressin Receptor Gene there all along? Was it bigger? Have we shrunken it? Hypothetically speaking if our bodies have stopped evolving because of our minds then our minds might still be evolving. Have we developed to the state that only our minds are evolving and soon we will be divided, as a society, not by our bodies but by our minds? I think it's quite possible that, with the choices a person is offered, we've developed or excluded certain sensory preceptors in our brains. (ie I've managed to constantly fight the urge to kick people's luggage and children's rolly backpacks. I mean seriously, why the fuck do those things exist except to trip people?!) Via Jezebel
Science, Sex Ed

DO YOU NEED A RULER: Which City Has The Biggest Dicks?

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The Gloss posted a study ranking the top 20 US Cities with the biggest average penis size. I have no idea how they figured this out, but I have a secret conspiracy theory that men have a secret book/interweb/network in which they measure their dicks against one another. Anyway, here's the list. 20 Cities Ordered by Penis Size 1. New Orleans 2. Washington DC 3. San Diego 4. New York City 5. Phoenix 6. Portland 7. Atlanta 8. San Francisco 9. Chicago 10. St. Louis 11. Seattle 12. Miami 13. Indianapolis 14. Columbus 15. Boston 16. Denver 17. Los Angeles 18. Detroit 19. Philadelphia 20. Dallas/Ft. Worth I would like to give a shout out to all my New York men, congrats for making it to number 4. I'm very satisfied with that number! Congrats to New Orleans with the clutch move at #1, very impressive. Though I honestly would have thought the biggest dicks would have been in Washington... Get it... because they're politicians!. Nevermind. Via Jezebel
Sex Ed

Why It Rocks To Have A Penis

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Here you have it, the first two-parter coming your way. Are you excited about the next one? I am! Men, we already went over Why It Sucks To Have A Penis, so now we shall celebrate all the great things you've got going for you. (Because we all know it's nice to sandwich a criticism in compliments!) 10 Reasons It Rocks To Have A Penis 1. Beards - I have said time and time again, how much I wish I could grow a beard. I have an odd fixation with beards. They come in so many different sizes, shapes, textures, colors, ect. Oh the possibilities are endless! 2. Lower STD Rates - Yeah, women are getting infected with STDs at a higher rate than men are. Additionally certain diseases, ie chlamydia, are not symptomatic in men. Meaning, while you can give it to that ho fo' sho' you just hooked up with, you're just an innocent carrier. 3. Pregnancy - Some of you might think that having babies sucks, I don't. But I do understand that our bodied (unless you're Kelly Ripa) will never look the same after pregnancy. So kick back and relax, when you have a baby you're body will not be affected! 4. Men Are Sluts - Is this a revelation? I think not. The sexual double standard works in your favor. Men are encouraged to be sexually promiscuous. So while women are still living in the age of the scarlet letter, men are free to go around and slut it up! 6 more reasons being a dude is awesome after the jump! Continue reading Why It Rocks To Have A Penis →
Sex Ed

Why It Rocks To Have A Vagina

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As promised I am delivering my first part of my first two-parter. If you loved Why It Sucks To Have A Vagina you'll moderately like this! 10 Reasons Why It Rocks To Have A Vagina 1. Babies - Freud says women have penis envy, well I say that men have womb envy. Yeah, you men claim to be so grateful that you don't have to deliver babies; but really, deep down inside, you're jealous. We give life unto the world and that rocks! 2. We Live Longer - Hello insurance check! Women generally get another few years on this earth! 3. We're Prettier - Let's face it, there's a reason countless paintings, sculptures, songs and poems have been dedicated to the bodies and faces of women. We're better looking! 4. Better Orgasms! - It's true, women have better orgasms. The clitoris is many times more sensitive than the tip of the penis. Our orgasms aren't only more intense than a man's but we can have different types of orgasms, count 'em, 3 types: clitoral, G-spot, and the newly discovered female prostate! 6 more reasons being a chick is awesome after the jump! Continue reading Why It Rocks To Have A Vagina →
Literature, Sex Ed

WHY MEN CHEAT: A Love Story

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Esquire published a story by an Anonymous Male (code name for Pansy) as to why men cheat. Pansy explains,
But men don't cheat because they can. Men cheat because they must, because they need to. This is the male struggle. Need compels us to try again. Because copulation is not in any way about fate. It is not about two individuals destined to meet on some dark night. It's about random collisions.
Pansy goes on to talk about what he thinks of a woman (specifically when he's doing her up against a soda machine... can you say romantic?)
And I know, believe me I know, that hell truly hath no fury like a woman scorned. I have made my mistakes. There are women who despise me. Women will never understand how men can cheat because they think of it in terms of themselves —as something done to them. They treat it as an affront first, as a breakdown in social order, then a wound, then a mortal wound. And this is a key. They do this because women are singular, in both their desire and their demands. This is why I serve women well. I treat them as planetary objects, individual and quirky, gravitational and unique. When I am with a woman, in a hotel or in her car, pressing her up against a soda machine in the stairwell, I let everything else fall away. I am with her without pretense, obligation, or fear.
Pansy you are so right. Women are such singular beings, I'm sure when you come home all your wife does is talk about herself, not ask you about your day, I'm sure she never cooks you dinner or washes your shorts, I'm sure she never thinks of you, only herself. That must be why you cheat, because you're not singular, yeah Pansy, you're deep, a fucking ocean of selflessness. You do serve women, serve away, I know I'm always up for a serving of dickhead. Jump to see how this article leads to a MissBleecker apology! (This is a once in a lifetime phenomenon folks!) Continue reading WHY MEN CHEAT: A Love Story →
Sex Ed

Why It Sucks To Have A Penis

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Men, I love you, and I give you guys credit for everything you have to do. I believe I truly understand why it sucks to be a guy, and please, if you wish to correct me after you finish reading this then let's go out for a drink (my treat!) Why It Sucks To Have A Penis 1. You Have To Pay For Dates - While I do think a man should pay for the first three dates (at the very least the first) and I'll always offer to go Dutch, there are women who expect men to pay for a lot more. In this economy it's hard to date, and we understand that. Please refer to my post, Free Ways To Get Laid if your pockets are a little light of late. 2. Rejection - We do expect you to make the first move, we also expect you to get the fuck away from us if we shoot you down. It's hard to deal with rejection on a regular basis. My hat goes off to all the men who try, fail and continue to try! 3. Condoms - We understand that it must feel very claustrophobic for your little Princess Sophia to be tightly wrapped up in latex... but understand that pregnancy/abortions are expensive and herpes never dies! 4. You Die Sooner - Death is something that everyone has to face, it just sucks that men have a few years less to spend on the earth. But just think of it like this, when you die your wife is going to be left with nothing to mend her broken heart... except for all your money, personal belongings and pension. I kid. Not really. 6 more reasons why it sucks to be a dude after the jump! Continue reading Why It Sucks To Have A Penis →
Sex Ed

Why It Sucks To Have A Vagina

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In my eternal quest to understand the true difference between men and women, I am devoting 2 posts, that's right not, just 1 but 2 posts to the difficulties associated with each set of genitalia. Since I'm a woman this list will come pretty easily. Here you go, the top 10 reasons why it sucks to be a woman. Why It Sucks To Have A Vagina 1. Menstruation - I've dedicated a lot of words to menstruation, and while it has to be said, I actually like having a period (it is what makes us women after all) it's still a pain in the ass. Cramps, mood swings, bloating all suck. And let's not forget what having a period does to your wallet (tampons are expensive.) 2. We Make Less Money - Statistically speaking we make much less money than men, women aren't given paid maternity leave and in the end we basically have to go to college to get a decent job. FACT: A woman that gets her BA will make the same amount of money as a man with just a HS diploma. 3. We're Not Taken As Seriously - Whether it's is class, with family, amongst friends or at work, a man's opinion, thought and/or ideas are taken more seriously than a woman's. 4. The Virgin/Whore Dichotomy - A lady in the street but a freak in the sheets. A motto I try to live my life by... just kidding. But seriously a woman's sexuality is a very delicate subject. Men and Women, myself included, make snap judgements about other women based on how we think she is sexually. 6 more reasons it sucks to be a chick after the jump! Continue reading Why It Sucks To Have A Vagina →