Shakira Isabel Mebarak Ripoll. The names rolls right off your tongue. The July Cosmo Cover Girl gets real with readers in a whole new way. While Writer tries to disguise Shakira's past through a lovely little piece of puffy, marshmallow fluff cloud Shakira's shady past shines brightly through like a sun that just won't get the fuck out of your eyes! Shakira started off innocent enough, wealthy in Colombia (which I guess means you have AC and a color TV [black and whites are so out]) until her family had to file for bankruptcy. When baby Shakira threw a temper tantrum from having her daytime stories taken away from her, papa brought her to a local playground where poor Colombian babies didn't wear shoes and resorted to "sniffing glue so they could forget how hungry they were." (Direct quote) From the day she saw baby orphans getting high she decided to help, how you ask? By singing and dancing of course! And now she has an educational charity called... "The Barefoot Foundation." She even titled her album, "Pies Descalzos... barefoot, a reference to orphans who can't afford shoes." (Another direct quote.) Oh yes, Shakira's a regular Mother Theresa. The happy-go-lucky article only continues with Shakira telling Writer that now, at 33, she's finally content enough to consider herself happy and that she has no plans to make an honest man out of her 10 year live-in boyfriend. She does, however, plan on using his sperm to have baby Shakira's, only after she's done another world tour of course; because while "There's something claustrophobic about the idea of marriage" for her she also thinks "it'd be impractical to belly dance 8 month's pregnant." If only every Cosmo Cover Girl were this candid about their lives and thoughts on social institutions. Some readers might think my snippets on the Shakira article are condescending or judgmental but if you really know The Bleecker you know that by nature I am both sarcastic and somewhat of a reactionary bitch and it seems that myself and Shakira are cut from the same cloth! Look out Shakira, the title of RadFem might soon be in your future if you keep it up like this!