It seems that George Lopez really knows how to sweet talk the ladies. First with his fated Vajazzle Interview with Jennifer Love Hewitt and now with Julie Bowen and what she likes to call the "double football hold." Bowen, who plays the tightly wound Claire on Modern Family brought a picture of herself breastfeeding her one year old twins. "They suck the fat out of you. They call it the 'double football hold.' You hold one here, and here [gesturing to her breasts], like two footballs. [This is] the end of my career."
Au contraire, you just showed your breasts on national television (is TBS national television?) this is just the beginning of a full, fruitful and perky career! Good for you Julie Bowen, for showing America what it looks like to breastfeed. If men are allowed to walk around without shirts, and we are forced to come face to face with their hairy, sweaty, beer gut-y torsos then why is it that when a mother tries to feed her child in public she's met with rolled eyes and disgusted smirks? I say no more! From now on, I will be staging a protest! For every man I see without his shirt on this summer, I'm going to flash a random stranger! I will have the words "Free" and "Tits" written on Paris and Nicole (that's what I named them back when those two were friends, no wonder they've been seeming a litter further apart recently...)
So, I still don't know the correct spelling, Vagazzle or Vajazzle, Completely Bare, the spa that offers the service spells it Vajazzle, but refers to the service as "completely bare with a Flair." Regardless, the first Vagazzle/Vajazzle post is by far my most popular, sickos! And so, in honor of that ill-fated post I shall give the people what they want! Below is the original video of Jennifer Love Hewitt on George Lopez talking about her Disco Ball!
Completely Bare is a spa, with 3 locations in Manhattan and 1 in Scarsdale (random.) The Vajazzling treatment itself will run you $115, but before you're able to encrust your cooter with crystals you'll need to plow you're lady garden; a completely bare Wax (a thorough wax removing everything, front to back) will run you $82. Which means you can drop almost $200 on your vagina in one visit to the Completely Bare Spa, not including numbing cream (which for some reason costs extra!), tax and tip (tip well!)
I said in my last Vajazzle post that I was on the fence as to whether or not this was a good idea; I've since formulated a thought! I think women should get Vajazzled! Since I don't think vajazzling is something women do strictly for men, I think it's something only a woman can truly enjoy, I would definitely do it! Vajazzling is a feminist expression, celebrating the vagina! So go on girl, frost yourself (How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days reference)!
And for the rest of you sickos out there, I know this is what you really wanted, PICTURES! Feast your eyes!
It seems that George Lopez really knows how to sweet talk the ladies. First with his fated Vajazzle Interview with Jennifer Love Hewitt and now with Julie Bowen and what she likes to call the "double football hold." Bowen, who plays the tightly wound Claire on Modern Family brought a picture of herself breastfeeding her one year old twins. "They suck the fat out of you. They call it the 'double football hold.' You hold one here, and here [gesturing to her breasts], like two footballs. [This is] the end of my career."
Au contraire, you just showed your breasts on national television (is TBS national television?) this is just the beginning of a full, fruitful and perky career! Good for you Julie Bowen, for showing America what it looks like to breastfeed. If men are allowed to walk around without shirts, and we are forced to come face to face with their hairy, sweaty, beer gut-y torsos then why is it that when a mother tries to feed her child in public she's met with rolled eyes and disgusted smirks? I say no more! From now on, I will be staging a protest! For every man I see without his shirt on this summer, I'm going to flash a random stranger! I will have the words "Free" and "Tits" written on Paris and Nicole (that's what I named them back when those two were friends, no wonder they've been seeming a litter further apart recently...) 
