Chapter 2: Analysis Of The "Not Myself Tonight" Lyrics

You know tonight I'm feeling a little out control Is this me? You wanna get crazy? Because I don't give a...

Aguilera introduces the audience to her song, auguring that there is going to be a shift in feminine dynamic from normal, innocent, docile, to out of control and crazy.

I'm out of character I'm in rare form And If you really knew me You'd know it's not the norm

Aguilera is telling the audience that she is deviating from her normal innocent self. However, we know this to be false because she has already shown us that she is not a normal pop star, see Dirrty, Beautiful, Stronger. What she is talking about is an artist's adaptability and reinvention. Aguilera calls out several pop stars who have gone through transformations, contradictory to what they've been portrayed as before. She makes the audience ask themselves, where should we draw the line between statement making and shock value art?

Cause I'm doing things that I normally won't do The old me's gone I feel brand new And if you don't like it fuck you

This is about reinvention for a gained value. "I'm changing, this is who I want to be so you need to take me as I am." She, as a woman, is a sexual being. Should we subscribe to the normal values of what is female? Aguilera seems to point a finger at artists who seemingly try to make feminist statements but continue to feed into the double standards oppressed upon women. Women are virgins or whores; either we are innocent and sweet but not sexual, or purely sex objects without any other higher value. Aguilera tells these female artists that they are themselves the effect to their own cause.

The music's on and I'm dancing I'm normally in the corner just standing I'm feeling unusual I don't care cause this is my night

Again Aguilera refers to her emergence into the world of darkness, night life. Usually in the corner, but now she's out and dancing. We again know that this is false because she hasn't been a docile little girl since before her Dirrty days, the better half of a decade ago. We can only assume that Aguilera is being both sarcastic and judgmental. She is telling the audience that they will be shocked by her intense behavior because we idealize her, first as an innocent teen and now as a married mother. She is also pointing her finger at all the other female artists who are constantly reinventing themselves to feed into the machine of: being a woman you must be overtly virginal or overly sexual.

I'm not myself tonight Tonight I'm not the same girl same girl I'm not myself tonight Tonight I'm not the same girl same girl

Aguilera repeats that she's not herself tonight, for one night only she will be wild, so catch her while you can.

I'm dancing a lot and I'm taking shots I'm feeling fine I'm kissing all the boys and the girls Someone call the doctor cause I lost my mind

Aguilera is asking the audience to look at themselves and how they lead their nightlife personas. She says she's feeling good, but she's doing things she normally wouldn't do. Taking shots and dancing causes her to behave in a more primitive state, kissing all the boys and the girls. Why do women get crazy when they go out? Because they drink and become sexual because of they repress themselves in their waking lives. Dance music seems to speak to people's primitive side; get drunk and be promiscuous.

In the morning When I wake Up I'll go back to the girl I used to be But baby not tonight

Adding to the idea that women are only allowed to let their sexual selves out on a limited basis. The sexual repression of women causes them to lash out and go crazy. They try to convince themselves that "this isn't me" that they'll go back to their normal selves in the morning. But for the night, while she's under the influence of alcohol and subliminal messages through music, she needs to let her freak out.

Yeah, that feels good I needed that Get crazy Let's go That's right Come on Give it to me now, don't stop

The last 30 seconds of the video, Aguilera is simulating an orgasm, I assume a fake one. We see her dry-humping a man on a bed, being bound and touched by numerous people. The words spoken by Aguilera continue, without much inflection, escalating, she breathes deeper and heavier until she stops, the world spins and everything blends together. How she would be able to have an orgasm between several layers of clothing is beyond me. It represents idealizing the female orgasm, a woman who cannot contain her pleasure, she needs to release it. Images of females having "easy orgasms" have been portrayed in films throughout the century, a woman, immediately upon a man climbing atop her, begins to orgasm.