I've been on the fence about the new Fox musical, Glee, since it's inception. The sneak peek summer episode was fabulous and reminiscent of Election, but when the seasons started the flare seemed to fizzle out. I couldn't place my finger on it, but I watched the first episode, after the hiatus, and by Jove, I've got it! The perfect analogy for Glee, Glee is an overdone filet mignon! The idea is good, everyone loves filet mignon, it's unique and rare and scrumptious. But... if you cook it for too long, like anything else, it will burn. Glee is overdone. There I said it! Now some seem to think the overdoneness of Glee is part of it's charm, and I'm not saying I don't find the show entertaining (I do), but from a storytelling standpoint, it just doesn't work. After the Glee Club won sectionals, the show took a break to prepare for the upcoming half of the season. Since we've come back, nothing has changed, I repeat in caps locks, NOTHING HAS CHANGED! The principle is still threatening to cancel Glee Club, again their survival rests on winning an upcoming competition (season finale anyone?), Sue is back as Cheerio Coach and trying to bring the Glee Club down, Will is still whining about how "life just isn't fair," Rachel is still getting slurpied, Kurt still wears funny clothes, Mercedes is still a diva, Artie's still in a wheelchair, the Asian guy still dances and doesn't talk and the various love triangles are still fucking complicated as fuck! These are the same exact storylines from the first half of the season! If Glee can't even last a season without repeating stories, the show is going to have a short lifespan. Step it up! For more on Glee and my new love, Jesse St. James, JUMP!

The 2 things that have changed are the new and delicious characters! Idina Menzel as Shelby Corcoran, the coach of the rival team, Vocal Adrenaline, seems to be poised as a wedge between "Crazy Eyes" Emma and Will. However... I have a conspiracy theory! Walk with me down hypothetical lane for a moment... When I first saw Glee I was like, "Fuck, Rachel looks exactly like Idina Menzel, they should have her come on the show as her mother." I know what you're saying, Rachel has 2 dads (and even though one of them is black, we still don't know who the father is. Side note: Maury should totes be a guest star!) how could Shelby be her mother? Well... I have a theory that we're going to find out she's her bio-mom and she gave her up/helped a gay sista out to help her singingness, which Rachel obviously inherited! AH HA! I've solved it! Also she says she's made out with gays before. Anyway, that's my babymamadrama theory. I doubt I'm right, but if I am I need to gloat and this is proof that I would be right, if in the future I am right. Right?! So, let's see what we covered: filet mignon, story lines, Idina Menzel, babymama- oh yes, my new favorite person ever... Jesse St. James! That name, that hair, that voice! I melt! The entire episode I was like, "When is something new going to happen?" And then, the clouds parted and god whispered, and it was the sound of wind blowing through Jesse St. James' luscious locks. Yeah, so he's a bit pretentious and he might not be completely on the level about his feelings for Rachel... but that just makes him even more sexy! Jesse's going to shake things up... I certainly wouldn't mind shaking things up with Jesse. (I'm sorry, that was a lame joke.) But seriously, what could possibly make Jesse St. James hotter and more of the perfect man for me?! He sings Highway To Hell! Future baby daddy alert! And that's pretty much my thoughts on Glee, and I didn't even mention how my ears bled when Finn sang The Door's classic Hello, I Love You. Oh, wait... Oh and Emma's a virgin. Didn't see that one coming. One last thing, because of last night's plaid suit, I'm putting Kurt on Outfit Watch!