Academy Members, get your Oscar ballots ready, because Burlesque is going to hit the big screens on November 24! The trailer premiered yesterday, and in the fashionably late scene (of which I am now a part, because, you know, I have more important shit to do than blog all day long) I am posting about this now! Side Note: I know I promised a Katy Perry Retrospective last weekend... that was a lie. But do expect it soon. I'm not going to say when, for fear of lying again and then having some crazed reader (show of hands for all the sane people who read RadCooks) show up in the morning, hovering over my futon begging me to stay in, not shower and write, just for them. So instead of having the possibility of that happen, I'm going to leave you guessing... but don't worry, you'll know it when it comes! Anyway... The Burlesque casting director went to Heaven and picked the brightest stars for the film. Who you ask? Well... Veronica Mars, evil man-vampire from Twilight, the child rapist/murderer from Lovely Bones, Emcee, McSteamy, Eyebrows, some blonde-ho from DWTS, Cher (is there any other name for her?), and RadCook's original RadFem, Lady Marmalade herself! Burlesque, like the Kla$$ act that came before it, Showgirls, tells the tale of a bright-eyed, cutey from a small town, who buys a one-way ticket to LA, hoping to make it big as a dancer! But Cher, the casting director for the burlesque club where Aguilera waitresses (sad face emoticon), is like, "Listen bitch, there's only room in this movie for one diva... and my wigs need your dressing room!" But then Christina's like, "Eat this! Whooooaaaaahhh-eeeeee-ooooooohhh!" And then everybody's like, "Damn she can sing! She's almost as good as that old ass pop singer. What was her name again? Where the hell is she? Oh right, she's starring in this shitty movie!" Love you Christina! You can get back on top, but just like Michael Jordan wasn't cut out for baseball... do I need to finish the analogy?