BREAKING BAD 5.3 Recap

This week's episode of Breaking Bad opens up in prison and we learn that Mike has two skills we weren't privy to before, (1) he moonlights as a paralegal and (2) he gives a mean side-eye. Okay, well we might have already known about the side-eye thing, but this is Mike, so any new face is worth mentioning. We learn that Mike is making the rounds to all of his "guys" to let them know that even though the DEA took all their Gus Hush Money, they will be receiving their "Hazard Money" soon. The new partners meet up at Saul's office to go scouting for new meth lab locales. As the four amigos scour greater Arizona for a dirty front, Walt has a light bulb moment at a pest control shack and realizes the best way to keep the DEA none the wiser and have an isolated lab are to keep it on the move and in other people's houses! Genius! Image and video hosting by TinyPic Follow the meth-fetti glitter bucket under the cut for more! While the big boys are busy setting up the pop-up meth lab, Jesse enlists the help of Badger and Skinny Pete to hop by the local music store and pick up some roadie cases (and play around with this sweet double-necked guitar.) Skinny and Badger suspect that Jesse is back in the business and reveal their desire to work with him and promise not to fuck up at all, which we totally believe. Walt and Jesse have a super secret meeting about their first cook at Jesse's place and then we realize he's still banging that ex-junky when she walks through the door with groceries and her silent video game obsessed child. While Jesse and the mom bang in the kitchen, Walt is left alone with the kid he poisoned to save his own ass, and he really doesn't have much to say to him since he's old and no longer knows how to talk to kids. Off at the car wash, Skyler and Marie eat undressed salads and discuss the best ways to get a streak-free shine when cray-cray Skyler goes bat-shit and politely tells Marie to SHUT THE FUCK UP. This is by far the best moment for Skyler on the show thus far. We could talk about Breaking Bad and all the awesome female characters they've had on the show, but they haven't. In spite of this I still watch it, not for the whiney, lazy housewives that talk too much, but for of the sexy bald men that barely say anything. And, you're welcome! So the first cook is done and it goes off without a hitch, Mike sells it easily and brings the fat stacks home to his two dads. The loads of cash make everyone happy for a second and then Mike starts unstacking the Benjis to give everyone else their cuts, including making sure his "guys" have their hazard pay. Walt is not happy about this at all and the two stare each other down for a minute and you just know someone is gonna do something to someone next episode. At least I hope so, Breaking Bad, I will say is starting off pretty solid but is also moving along slowly, I'm guessing to set up something bigger later on down the road. Surely Mike and Walt are going to have a showdown and Jesse will definitely uncover the kid-poisoning scheme, but we just have to sit and wait for the shit to hit the fan.

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